I love YOU, I love ME, part 1

It's a challenge for all of us at times to be around others and still be true to ourselves.  This can be in personal relationships, with family, and definitely at work.

How do you stay true to yourself around others?

How do you not?

What does all this mean?  To me, it's simply about accepting ourselves, being true to ourselves...period.

Try taking a little quiet time, to let yourself relax and breathe.  Focus your mind on your belly and breath, a happy image, or a place you love in nature...now...just let yourself breath, breathing in and breathing out...breathing in and breathing out...relax...let whatever sensations and feelings you may be having to just be there...now try the words, "I am loveable"..."I am worthy of love"..."I love myself".

Blessings to you.

A Single Word Can Affect Your Reality!

I have experienced chronic health issues in the past.  Actually for years in my twenties I was extremely ill.  During this time I became very sensitive/allergic to things most of us aren’t, or don’t realize we are.  I had your “normal” pollen allergies, but I also became sensitive to molds, and chemicals, and foods that until that time I never had a problem with.

Now what’s amazing is how this and other experiences we have can change and affect us.  And affect me it did.  I fought and worked like I never had before with such passion to get well, but I also was thrown into a world of survival, literally.  I reacted to everyday things with such intensity that they made me incredibly ill.  My body was in such a state that it simply couldn’t process/detox things we take for granted.  Everything became a threat.

Today I took a supplement that I have taken in the past, and felt for a brief time, extreme tingling sensations, a flushing throughout my body and into my extremities, a speeding up of my breathing.  All of these were automatic responses to what I had taken.  *  They did not last long because I simply allowed myself to feel them, without distress.  I allowed myself to relax and breathe, and noted how my body RESPONDED to the substance.  

After some time I noticed how the word RESPONSE better fit the experience I was having at this time, but also helped me to accept the experience, in contrast to the word REACT, if I had chosen to use that.

How can you see situations in your life differently by using words with different meanings, and what meanings do you ascribe to your words?

Best Regards.

* Note:  These can be responses to other problems that may be serious.  This is not meant to be a medical article offering advice.  If you experience health issues/symptoms, please advise your health professional.

Also note some responses for some or to some things can be life threatening.  In the past mine were, as can be peanuts or any other substance to someone else.

You and Me

I look at you and see limitation.

Whose limitation, whose fear?

Yours or mine?

Is this what I expect of you, or what is expected of me...what I see in you, or what I fear in me?

Who took the power from me, you or me?

When did I start to believe this is the way it has to be?

Till I remember myself to be that which exists beyond you and beyond me, and embraces all that exists, even you and me.

STOP working so hard, and try BEING

On the path of growth there have been many times I have found myself working hard. Change is hard work. It takes commitment, fortitude, time, intention.

There have been times I have worked when I needed to let go, our just "be", however. That's a tough one for me and for many of us. Finding peace or quiet within the storm. Not thinking I have to do it all myself, like it's all on my shoulders.

I remember when I decided to let go of my anger towards my father. It was a conscious decision I made because I wanted greater healing and peace in my life. This brought forth a lot of my unresolved issues with him and gave me the opportunity to deal with them. My approach to healing at the time was similar to what it had been during my time of illness, to approach it with gusto, to work hard, breathe hard, stomp my feet hard, process hard.

I've since learned how to "be" more, which is a learned skill, but one anyone can do, which is to just notice the feelings and thoughts as they come up. Instead of engaging with them, I have taught myself to relax and breathe, allowing the feelings to just flow, and the thoughts to just come and go.

There are times I still struggle, and like everyone still have triggers. One has been about food. I don't like people talking "badly" about food, especially when I'm eating it. Sometimes I would say this, at other times I would find myself sitting down to eat again afterwards faced with a battle going on in my mind. I would be confronted with this individual whom I had to convince of my beliefs, or otherwise feel invisible. And so at times I found myself working hard, when in fact there is no one to convince, no one to fight, to defend myself against; just an opinion, someone's thought, and I'm just left fighting with myself.

Just "be".

To all the Men out there; You are more than your D***

There are 1000's of receptors in your penis. But your body is a wealth of receptors, and there's no shortage, so why limit yourself to one organ!

I've recently begun to allow myself the joy of a pedicure. Even a self pedi is wonderful. Just take some epsom salts, perfumed with lavender or mint, placed in a tub with some hot water, aaah! I found this really cool cleaning supply bucket, which has two compartments, one for each foot at Target, www.target.com. How great is that! Follow that with a little TLC of clipping, sanding, trimming, and you'll feel like a new man.

Just in case you're worried, there's nothing girly about it. It feels good taking care of yourself, even your feet!  We all have feelings, we experience sensations. Don't limit yourself. Life is short. Take time to love yourself.

Roles We Play; I'm Smeagol?

Have you ever wondered who you are, who you truly are?  Are you a father?  Are you a wife, a lover?  Do you see yourself as a boss, an Engineer, a criminal perhaps?  Maybe you think of yourself as a joker, or an angry bitter individual, a victim, a survivor, or someone who sees the glass half full.

Who exists beyond the roles you and I play in our lives?

I have played many roles in my own life.  I’d like to introduce you to one of them.  I call him Smeagol.  You remember that poor decrepit creature in The Lord of the Rings?  As you read through this, allow yourself to reflect on roles you have played or still find yourself taking on.  This can be a fun exercise in exploration that brings greater understanding and awareness to your life.

Smeagol is scared.  Smeagol desperately does not want to be seen.  He sees the world and others through the belief that he has to prove himself, that he has to be perfect, and that if others see him they will no doubt reject him.  

Smeagol is angry.  Smeagol blames others for his problems and fear.  He needs others to accept him, and wants to let others know how they have hurt and caused him suffering by constantly rejecting him.

Smeagol is sad.  Smeagol wants to know love and acceptance.  Smeagol wants to open his arms and love himself and others.  Smeagol is tired of hurting.

 

I have at times been scared of Smeagol.  At other times I have fought Smeagol and even tried to run from him.  Many times I have accepted him, and yet others I thought I was him.

As I reflect on this for myself and all of us processing and working through aspects of ourselves that no longer serve us this image and prayer comes to mind...

“I am ready to let go of all resistance to this part of myself.  As I stand surrendering to this moment and all of me I allow myself to embody my soul self, feeling my connection to spirit, while remaining firmly grounded to my present home and body.  I let the winds of time blow through and around me, cleansing me to my core.  I am a powerful spiritual being having a physical experience.”

You Don't Breathe Enough!

Okay, I have to confess first, I am a big breather.  I am a fan of breathing.  I admit!!  I have a tainted view on the subject of breathing.  There, I said it.

Why breathe?  I mean, why breathe beyond what is essential to sustain life?  Because it helps to increase your bodies oxygen, and it will help you to relax and process feelings more easily, and because it just feels good.

It's been my experience that most of us are scared of uncomfortable experiences.  I'm talking of the internal kind, emotions/sensations like fear, anxiety, anger, pain, etc.  And we're very good at finding creative ways to avoid them.  We blame others, we look for distractions around us, anything not to feel.

And so breathing solves all of this?  No...but it's a good start.

Simply take time every day, as often as necessary, to just be present with whatever you are experiencing.  I said experiencing, not thinking.  Try focusing on your breath, and let yourself relax, just let yourself be, as you allow your breath to deepen your experience.  Feel your belly rising and falling with each breath, letting that become your focus.  Allow your feelings to just become part of the process.  ”I'm breathing and I'm feeling ... I may not like it, I don't have to like it but that's okay, I'm okay, and I'm breathing.”  Allow yourself to feel the safety of your breath, something that’s been a constant for you from the moment you were born.  Think of it like the currents in the ocean, allowing the waves to rise and fall.  The ocean being a mass of energy that has been here since the earth was formed, ever present, stable.

Now breathe, and let yourself enjoy the experience wherever it may take you.

How often do you find yourself arguing with someone, whether they’re present or not.  Have you ever found yourself arguing about some idea in your own head?

Maybe you think everyone should use their turn signals.  It could be that you have strong views about the need for socialized health care.

What is it that you need when you try to state your case?  What would it mean to you if you were not heard, or if your opinion were not received?  What if you did not feel like you needed to defend yourself, or even explain yourself?
What makes this all so personal?

What if you knew  that your truth is completely valid, and that others truths are too?  
What if you could see that each truth is simply a different color in a tapestry made up of every color imaginable,  all making up a greater truth?  

Your truth has value, as do you.  Each of us is worthy and deserving, and it is important that we remember this, not only for our own sake, but to the world around us, our family and our friends as well.