Saturday, November 24, 2012

Body Meditation


First, take your focus and become aware of your breath moving in and out of your belly.  Notice as your belly moves up and down with each breath.  Breathing in and breathing out, breathing in and breathing out.  Just for this moment nothing is more important than your focus and attention on your breath moving in and out of your belly, noticing your belly rise and fall with each and every breath.  Continue to focus on this movement for some time longer allowing yourself to relax in the rhythm of your breath, breathing in and out, in and out, noticing your belly rise, feeling your belly fall.

As you continue to focus on your belly rising and falling, imagine it as a wave and your body an expanse of water.  Relaxing your body even more, let the energy spread from the movement of your belly rising and falling out into your body.  Feel your breath move all the way down to the very tips of your toes, rocking you ever so gently into a deeper state of relaxation.

As you continue this way of breathing begin to allow your awareness to move throughout your entire body.  Starting first at your feet, become aware of how your feet feel.  Are they relaxed, are they squashed in your shoes?  Are they warm or cold?  Just allow yourself to become aware of any sensations or feelings you may be experiencing here at this time without judgement.  There is no right and wrong in the experience, there is only the experience.  You do not have to try and push any feelings away or be afraid of them, you are simply observing, noticing, becoming aware of, and breathing.  Breathing in, and breathing out.  If at any time during this exercise you feel overwhelmed, simply go back to noticing your belly as you breathe in and out, your belly rising and falling with each breath.  Use this as an anchor.

Continue to move your awareness now up from your feet into your legs and hips, into your abdomen, organs, and chest, allowing your awareness to expand with each breath as you go deeper into the experience of your body and yourself, breathing in and breathing out.  Notice what happens as you bring your loving awareness to yourself and any areas of tension / stress.  Notice what happens as you give them space.  As you bring your attention and breath to these areas notice your awareness continuing to expand and open.  Opening with awareness and breath, experiencing greater relaxation and peace, breathing in and breathing out.

Take some time to feel this throughout these areas.  Noticing gently, and breathing.

Allow your awareness to move to your spine, your shoulders and your neck, continuing to breath, just gently noticing, relaxing more with each breath, as your attention softens, gently expanding your awareness, opening your self to new sensations and feelings.  Finally allow your awareness to move to your head and arms, expanding, breathing, being.

Now let your mind move to your heart.  This is an area where we experience love and compassion for others and other things.  It's also an area where we receive and accept love for ourselves.  I would like you to just become aware of this area for a while, noticing any sensations or feelings you may have here as you breath, gently.

Now visualize one thing you would like more of in your life at this time.  It may be peace, or healing.  It may be abundance, joy, or healthy relationships.  Whatever it is, allow yourself to become clear on what you really need at this time.  Now see yourself as already having this.  Allow yourself to feel what it would feel like to have this in your life now...and with each breath, allow that feeling to expand from your heart to your whole body, breathing in and breathing out.  Gently allow each breath to expand this thought, this desire, this feeling into each part of your body and being, until you aren't just thinking about what it is you want, you are it...breathing and knowing, I am ...... Breathing and knowing I am ......

Now when you are ready, gently let yourself become aware of your feet as they rest of the floor, the chair or cushion you are sitting or resting on.  Become aware of the place you are in, knowing that as you do, you are bringing this new sense of awareness, and experience with you.  You are that ...... that you brought into your attention.  As you come back into the present moment, know that you can come back to this feeling, this experience and awareness at any time.  This is not something outside of you, it is you, and the more you focus on it, the more you allow yourself to relax into it, the more you nurture it, and the more you nurture yourself.

Thursday, September 13, 2012

What's wrong with NEWS?

Most of us watch it, and many complain about it, but is there anything wrong with it?  No, not in and of itself.  It's information, albeit sometimes subjective, but nevertheless information.  The biggest problem I have is the type of information that is being focused on.

The other day Christopher Stevens, in a tragic attack on the US Embassy in Egypt, died, after protestors stormed the embassy following news that an anti-Mohammad movie was released or made.
What I would like to hear about besides this side of the story is what else happened.  I would like to hear about the Muslims that came to the aid of those in the Embassy.  I would like to hear of what others in the area are doing to discourage such senseless crimes.  I would like to hear about the moderates, the majority, the regular citizens that want a world where they can raise their children safely, and make a decent living.

Like with our own views and beliefs, there are always many sides to every story and truth that are also valid and need our attention. It is my premise that these areas need our attention at least as much as the main story here. 

As a Counselor I help clients each day to question their thoughts and beliefs, to look behind their thoughts to the meaning of what they are saying.  I ask them to to stop and question the truth of their statements, gently pushing them to see a greater truth, a bigger picture.

We can all do the same, and I would like to see this reflected more in our News programs as well.  It's too easy to focus on what is wrong, and who is wrong, or who did wrong, without stepping back and seeing the whole picture.

My prayers to all those hurt or killed in these senseless attacks.

Monday, August 27, 2012

Don't focus on that, focus on this!?

Focus on what?



Your problems.  Don't focus on your problems, focus on what you want, your hearts desire, what you yearn for, your passion...

Well that makes good sense............but, if it were only that easy!!!

Many of us try to live by this philosophy, only to end up dwelling on our problems or spending all kinds of time and energy trying to avoid them.  This can be very subtle or extreme.  Often we find ways of avoiding by working too much, over-committing ourselves, drugs or alcohol, exercise...  So where does that leave us and what do we do?

It's important that I make a distinction here.  There is a big difference between focusing or rather dwelling on our problems, and all that is wrong in our life and who caused us such pain and anger..., versus focusing or loving awareness of our bodies sensations and feelings.  We all know the first part very well, because we all have done it, or still do it, and yet most will agree that the outcome is always the same, suffering.
So what do I mean loving awareness.  Well let me elaborate.  I have written some in the past on Body Awareness which looks at this in more detail, so feel free to look that up on my Blog.  Let's do a small exercise here...

Sitting with your feet on the floor, allow yourself to take a few deeper breaths, noticing your belly as it moves in and out with each breath, breathing in and breathing out.  Nothing is more important in this moment than your breath, breathing in and breathing out.  Now as you continue to breathe, move your mind or awareness to your pelvis and just notice what you are feeling or sensing in this area.  Slowly moving your attention up from your pelvis to your solar plexus, just becoming aware of any sensations or feelings.  As you do know that just for this moment there are no good and bad feelings, there is no need in this moment to judge, or to make anything right or wrong  You are just noticing, feeling out what is going on, allowing yourself to feel what is going on, knowing it's okay, and that you are okay, regardless of how you feel in this moment.  With this awareness continue to slowly move your mind throughout your body remembering to breathe, as breath will help you to move through or process whatever is going on, breathing in, breathing out.  Just for now whatever I'm feeling is okay, I'm okay...breathing.

Loving awareness is as simple as noticing what we're feeling and where we're feeling it in our body, whether it be a sensation like tension or pain, or a feeling.  We can use words such as, "I am noticing this ...", "I am noticing the feeling of ...", "I am noticing resistance/defensiveness", "I am experiencing the feeling of ..." or "I am experiencing ...".  Whatever works for you.  The idea with using phrases like this is that we are differentiating ourselves, or the greater part of ourselves and the feeling or sensation, which is different from saying, "I am anxious".  See for yourself.  And again, don't forget to breathe.  

On a final note, you can spend longer with any feeling or sensation to explore it if you are able to hold the awareness...which leads me to the next part.  What happens to many of us as why try to maintain any type of awareness is that our minds go somewhere else, a thought, a memory, what caused us to feel this way, etc.  This exercise then serves multiple purposes.  It helps us to actually process an experience without ruminating on it.  It helps us to train our minds to be more present, and to live/be in the moment.  It helps us to build a deeper more kind and loving relationship with ourselves, and it gives us a great tool for taking better care of ourselves.

Now that you are hopefully feeling in a better place, you can focus on your passion with more openness and love.  The way I see it is, now our focus will be clearer, because there won't be so much in the way.  Put in another way, you will have a stronger foundation on which to build what you want!  A suggestion on focusing on your goals; use I statements, and the present tense, and try the word grateful.  Here's an example, "I am healthy", or "I am grateful to be healthy", while allowing yourself to get into the feeling of what that would feel like and seeing yourself as being healthy, if you can.

Happy Journeys.








Friday, August 17, 2012

Mental Health...it's all of our business.




I just read about the shooter from Arizona being sentenced to life after being deemed competent to stand trial.  I felt sad for everyone involved, and thought, like many of you, what could have been done to prevent this tragedy?  Never mind the pain and loss for the families affected directly and indirectly by his actions, but also what about his family?

So my questions come...
Where was everyone in his life; employers, friends, family, schools, doctor, etc?
Why does one have to say, "I'm suicidal and have a plan and the means to carry it out.", or "I'm homicidal and have a plan and the means to carry it out." before anyone takes you seriously?
Why is it okay that people with severe mental illness are walking the streets talking to themselves because they're in ”no imminent danger to themselves or others”?
Why do we not do more, rather then just talk about prevention!
Why is it easier for us as a society to wait for people to commit a crime from which they'll face jail time, rather then offer them access to services before the fact?  Time in jail costs all of us much more then prevention and also rehab, and does nothing to prevent recidivism.

And yet, why ask why.  I know how our society works.  I see people genuinely wanting change and even taking steps to make it happen, but it's something we all need to reflect on.  We all need to look at and take responsibility for ourselves, and also come together as a society with our many talents to grow, learn, and help one another do the same.  There aren't easy cookie cutter answers, don't believe the people who tell you there are.

Wednesday, June 13, 2012

Everything is Perception?





I have always held the belief that I am afraid of public speaking.  Holding this belief it has always been my perception that I, as the speaker, am the expert.  With this perception then I had to have all the answers.  You the audience therefore, were there to learn and ultimately bathe in my wisdom.

What if, however, I don't know everything?  What if I stumble and fall?  What if you call me out?  ...And there we have the reason for mine, and many others fear of public speaking, I believe.

What would happen if I held a very different belief?  What if I choose to believe instead that I am a student of life, which by the way seems closer to the truth.  Would that change the dynamics slightly?  As a student of life I am forever learning, and therefore can't fail.  If I see myself as a student it allows me to see you and others as students too.  As students, you too perceive all opportunities as potential for growth, for sharing, for change.

How do your perceptions affect your view?

PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder) Part III




So you have PTSD, now what...and can anything help?

There are numerous treatments being used for PTSD at this time quite successfully.  I will discuss a few here.  But let me say this, there are also many ways that you can take care of yourself.  There are many paths to healing, not all are the same for everyone.  The methods described here are therapeutic techniques utilized by either Psychologists (PhD), Licensed Professional Counselors (LPC), Licensed Clinical Social Workers (LCSW) or Licensed Marriage and Family Therapists (LMFT).  (For a discussion of other treatments see PTSD Part II) 


CPT (Cognitive Processing Therapy) is a structured technique that combines ideas from CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy), and Exposure Therapy to create a program specific for PTSD.  By teaching participants to use CBT principles therapists are then able to have them write and talk about their experiences in a safe environment.  The therapist continues to guide the client into further inquiry into their thoughts and beliefs with the idea that the client will be able to begin to construct new healthier ways of thinking about themselves, others, and the world around them.
Here is a link to provide you with more information about CPT.

EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing)  is another very successful treatment modality for PTSD, though different from the others discussed here.  I would put it in a similar category to Biofeedback.  It involves using a simple eye movement technique that affects or accesses different areas in the brain and enables processing of information / trauma in sometimes a very rapid way.  Unlike other treatments which ask clients to re-experience events and emotions from the past, EMDR helps the client process on a different level.
Here is a link to the EMDR Institute for more information, EMDR Institute.

CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy) is a well known treatment that encompasses a lot of ideas.  On a basic level CBT's theory is that our thoughts create feelings which effect our behaviors.  Many of these thoughts are automatic and go unquestioned.  More often then not a single thought is followed by other supporting thoughts.  The techniques used in CBT teach us to approach one thought at a time and question its truth.  Through the process of questioning our thoughts we hold as truth we open ourselves to new possibilities
and new ways of thinking.
Here is a link from another good source on mental health...CBT

I do want to say a word about Rogerian or Supportive Therapy as well.  The premise is this, the Counselor simply endeavors to understand the client and how the client sees the world.  The Counselor does not try to interpret, direct or teach the client, rather they simply provide a warm and supportive atmosphere in which the client can do some self-exploration.  It may seem logical that this would be helpful to many, but as we all we sometimes like to complicate things. 

The last subject I want to touch on here is that of pharmacology, or medicine.  Medicines can sometimes play a role in recovering from PTSD, either in conjunction with other therapies or by themselves, depending on the needs of the client.  Two FDA approved medications for PTSD are Zoloft and Paxil, though there are other medications used successfully in the treatment of PTSD; Prozac, Celexa, Klonopin, Buspar, Trazedone, etc.

All these therapies have in common the idea that to heal we have to face our demons.  Mind you they do it in different ways, some more gently than others.  Avoiding, which we all learn to do so well, just embeds the pain, and causes more dysfunction on a behavioral and mental level.  When we do this we start to associate non threatening circumstances as a threat, and think of ways to not feel, to not remember the pain, fear, and anger inside, which in turn then begins to control our lives.

The good thing is the hurt is over, the bad thing is, you still carry it inside...not what are you going to do about it?

Since as of this writing I am in Denton, TX., I would like to provide a few links to organizations in the are that can be beneficial...

Friends of the Family
Denton County MHMR
Mental Health of America
Operation Healthy Reunions
US Dept of Veterans Affairs
Veterans services of Denton County
UNT Counseling and Testing Department


Thursday, June 7, 2012

PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder), Part II


Most people when they think of PTSD think of Veterans.  The fact is there is a wide range of people suffering from PTSD, and just as wide a range of degree of symptoms.

I suffered from PTSD due to a chronic illness I had in my twenties  I was ill for almost 8 years and came close to dying during the process.  Because I was chronically ill I developed a host of symptoms and problems.

My PTSD symptoms couldn't be categorized as debilitating.  I didn't wake up in cold sweats every night, nor did I hide under my bed during the day.  I did, however, have nightmares occasionally.  I also suffered from anxiety bordering on paranoia, and constantly felt defensive and scared.  I held beliefs such as, "I can't trust myself/others", "The world is not a safe place", and "I'm not safe".  All of this was enough to affect the quality of my life, my relationship with myself, and my relationships with others..

I took care of my physically needs first, which makes sense since my life revolved around getting well and learning about various health practices.  "Getting well" came in stages, however, like peeling an onion.  As my physical health began to improve and my body started to waken, my emotions began to come out; old unresolved issues/thoughts and beliefs began to surface.  Healing was happening.  During my illness I prayed / set the intent that I not only wanted to heal physically but on every level, though I didn't really know what that meant at the time.

This is my journey so it's not going to be the same for everyone.  I approached this process much the same way as I did my illness, with determination, bordering on obsessive-compulsive tendencies.  I continued, and continue to do things to take care of my physical needs, knowing my body, mind, and emotions are all intricately intertwined.

I eat well.  The food we eat becomes the building blocks that create our bodies and all their functions; neurotransmitters, hormones, enzymes, besides the more obvious ones.  So yes, the food we eat effects our entire person.

I find time every day to stretch / practice Yoga.  Stretching and Yoga when done mindfully help us to be more present / in the moment.  They help us release stress, increase our flexibility and oxygen intake into our muscles and organs, and increase our energy to name a few benefits.

I go to a Chiropractor every few weeks, though I don't have back problems.  Chiropractic helps the whole body.  As nerves running from the spine effect every organ and system in the body, maintaining good back health effects our overall health.  (though let me say I go to a gentle Chiropractor)

I take breaks throughout the day to take time for myself, to relax, to practice mindfulness, which as I've said helps me be more present.  This among other things has helped me to make friends with my emotions, and also challenge my thoughts and beliefs when they no longer serve me.  (I will be creating a Post called Mindfulness in the near future)

I learned these approaches during the time of my illness and healing.  There are other approaches I used in the past as well, to help me get to this place of healing.  I have been to Counseling, which not only helped me to process with someone in a safe space, but also helped me to become more comfortable with myself.  I have also utilized the services of a Hypnotherapist, an Acupuncturist, and Massage Therapists.  All of these experiences have become part of my journey and life, a tapestry if you will that continues to evolve.

What I have found is that no two people will follow the same path, though there are basic tools that I think make up the foundation for creating a healthy being.  The tools I have discussed in my own practice will be beneficial to anyone willing to spend the time on themselves.  After that, it becomes a personal experience, and each person will have to find what works / fits for them.